The liberal, the conservative, and the drowning man.

A certain liberal was waking through the forest towards a lake. Upon arriving at the shore, the liberal saw a man thrashing about in the middle of the lake. It was instantly obvious that the man did not know how to swim, and would soon succumb to the water. The liberal yelled out, "I'll save you!"

The enlightened liberal began thinking of ways save the man and to prevent this from happening again. Under consideration was giving the man a life preserver, which quickly escalated into giving everyone a life preserver. Except if you have a boat. If you have a boat, you are dry and should therefore give the life preservers on your boat to the government for redistribution.

Signs should be posted illustrating the hazards of being on the water. A fence should be constructed to prevent people from getting into the water. The lake bottom should be raised so that the man could walk to shore from anywhere on the lake.

As the liberal was contemplating, a conservative saw the man in the lake. Immediately the conservative began running for the lake and, after stripping off shoes and heavy clothing, dove into the water. A moment later the drowning man was on shore. The conservative offered to teach him how to swim.

The liberal, seeing that the conservative had stolen the "drowning" issue, started yelling about how the conservative had destroyed the pristine shoreline; how the conservative had risked the life of the drowning man; how the conservative had been reckless with resources like shoes and clothing.

The conservative shrugged off this criticism, got dressed, and walked home, happy in the knowledge that the drowning man was better for the action taken, not the good intentions.